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A Totally Incoherent Pokernight

To: poker-night
From: electroblake
Subject: A Totally Incoherent Pokernight
Date: Thu, 1 Feb 2007 20:01:34 -0500

Missy Blob loved her little blob son, Blob. Blob and Missy Blob
lived in the town of Blobtown which was actually a simulated town
running on a computer of moderately impressive computing power in the
room of a student at a college in a country called Blobcountry on
planet Blob. Missy Blob was actually a simulation of a real girl who
shared a couple of classes with the young student who owned the
moderately impressive computer. The young owner of the moderately
impressive computer had a crush on the real girl but was too shy to
talk to her in real life so he decided to create a simulated world in
which he could control every aspect of the Missy Blob simulation
rather than work up the gumption to say something like, “Hello there,
I wonder if you would like to go to a study group with me?” or “Hi
there! Want to grab a cup of coffee after class sometime?” Talking
was for amateurs, the young student had decided. It was much better
to just simulate everything and then you knew exactly what would
happen. He had watched a simulated version of himself having sex
with Missy Blob several times. He never expected baby Blob, though.
That one was a surprise. The young student wasn’t quite sure what to
do about it. Obviously he could never tell the real girl that Missy
Blob was modeled after about the baby. She probably wouldn’t
understand the kind of complex and deep feelings that drive a young
man to create a simulation of a girl and then have simulated sex with
it night after night. She’s probably think he was some kind of freak
or something. He thought that maybe he should just halt the program,
erase all the data, maybe start over again and add simulated
contraception into the program.

The young owner of the moderately impressive computer just couldn’t
bring himself to do it. Being honest with himself he realized that
he felt more connected to the Missy Blob simulation than he had ever
felt about any real person. He could not bear the idea of sending
her to a realm of non-existence, wherever it is all the dirty
pictures and embarrassing journal entries go when you eventually come
to your senses and clean up your hard drive. The young student
wasn’t sure if there was a place that people went to after they died,
but he was pretty sure that when a simulated person’s program stops
they just stop existing altogether and that horrible idea tended to
keep him up late at night worrying about the fragile existence of his
beloved. He started making nightly backups instead.

The baby was his, after all. Baby Blob. He couldn’t just kill it.
To the young owner of the moderately impressive computer the
simulated baby Blob was something of a miracle. He watched with
excitement as well as trepidation as the thing grew, ever so slowly,
but different day by day. Missy Blob was always a wreck these days.
Taking care of a simulated baby can be quite a lot of work,
especially when the father is still an undergrad and so absorbed with
classes that he hardly seems to have any time for the child at all.
Missy Blob worried that baby Blob didn’t see enough of his father.

Missy Blob was uncertain of her own feelings towards the young
student. At first they were quite simple. She was simply attracted
to him. She would spend her days trying on different sets of
lingerie and bikinis, posing in a virtual mirror and practice kissing
her virtual pillow. She had no ambition beyond making the young
student happy. Since the baby arrived she’d grown quite a bit. Her
love for the baby was equal to her love (if you can call it that) for
the young student, yet it seemed oddly inappropriate to treat the two
of them the same way. The baby hardly reacted at all to the sight of
her dressed in slinky black panties and a bra, though when the bra
came off it did seem to react positively to the sight of her bare
nipples. She was quite surprised to find that milk now poured forth
from her virtual breasts when the young babe suckled on them. They
never, ever had done that for the young student.

As time went on Missy Blob found herself more and more absorbed with
the child and feeling less and less attracted to the young student.
In truth, the young student didn’t mind because he was pretty freaked
out by the whole thing, but he too felt a love for the child and when
he had the time, on weekends and sometimes late at night, he would
visit the two of them and Missy Blob would greet him kindly wearing a
checkered green dress with a white apron or a pink pants suit or
sometimes when the baby was acting up especially she’d greet him in
sweat pants and curlers. The young student hardly wanted to have sex
with her at all, what with the baby in the other part of the screen.

Seeing all of this happen over the course of a few minutes the young
student, owner of a much more impressive computer, ends the
simulation, glad he had the good sense to spend weeks and weeks
writing up a simulation of what would happen if he were to create a
simulation of that girl he liked but was too nervous to talk to.
Simulated baby! Preposterous! Looking at his desktop clock, he
smiles, because the whole simulation took much less time than he had
anticipated, and he still has time to go to Pokernight.

“first hand at nine”

Dangerhouse is XX Xxxxxxxxx Xx. #X somerville USA.

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