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DangerGiving Poker Night

To: poker-night
From: Blake
Subject: DangerGiving Poker Night
Date: Thu, 25 Nov 2004 11:35:40 -0500

A long time ago, on a planet far far away, a colony of robots was
struggling to make it through the harsh winter of this strange new
world. The robots had used up all of the hydrogen used to power their
fuel cells during the long and lonely voyage across the stars, and
even running at maximum efficiency the limited amount of solar
radiation filtering through the planet’s thick atmosphere was hardly
enough for the robot colony’s array of solar powered hydrogen
generators to produce even a thin trickle of the non-life giving
substance. In retrospect, the robot captain and colony governor
realized, they should have landed on the summer side of the planet, or
at least somewhere closer to the equator, as to lengthen the number of
radiation collection hours in the day, but as we all know, robots love
the cold.

Meanwhile, a nearby city-state of aliens were watching the robots
carefully. The aliens had never seen a real non-live robot before and
many of the hip and trendy aliens thought it would be just keen to
make friends with the robots and assimilate them into their alien
culture. However, the elder, and therefore less cool, aliens, wizened
with their years, felt that it was prudent to hold off on opening
relations with these new robot neighbors until they had a better
understanding of what the robots wanted.

Well, as we all know, it turned out that what the robots wanted was
hydrogen, and since the aliens’ hydrogen economy was well established
all that was necessary to open trades between the two groups was for
the aliens to figure out something that the robots had that the aliens
wanted. The obvious answer was space travel. Though the aliens were
quite smart and enlightened and such, they had not yet figured out how
to get themselves off of their one measly little planet so that they
could rule the universe as in the stories of old. The alien elders
decided they would bring to the robots a gift of precious hydrogen,
and then get them ripping drunk at a hedonistic celebration the robots
would have never seen the likes of, as alien secret agents riffled
through the robots’ data files and stole the secrets of space travel
from them.

The robots, very near total system shutdown, welcomed the aliens with
open robot arms. Within minutes of injecting the gift of precious
hydrogen into the colony’s fuel distribution network all the robots
had charged back up to full power. The captain/governor of the robots
thanked the aliens and asked how it was the aliens had come across
this most precious gift. When it came to be known that the hydrogen
had come from the filling station not 10 clicks away the
captain/governor formed a battle plan and beamed that plan into the
robot minds of his generals and not one second later the robots began
their attack. Within two days the entire alien civilization was in
ruin. Those aliens which survived the massacre were made to be slaves
for the working class robots, the more beautiful specimens taken as
pets for the rich.

DangerGiving is a day when we celebrate that brief moment when robots
and aliens got along peacefully. We of DangerHouse invite you to join
us as we reenact this glorious event, in the form of a giant feast
featuring turkey, which represents hydrogen, and bloody marys, which
represent space travel.

DangerGiving is an all day event, with bloody marys and mimosa
starting around 2:00, turkey and other foods starting around 3:00,
poker night starting at 9:00, and other happy events all night long.

In short

You and Your Cute Friends are invited to:

A Very Dangerous Thanksgiving III

to be followed by PokerNight

to which you, and said cute friends, are also invited to.

The first batch of bloody mary has already been prepared.

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