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Trouble at Poker Night

From: Blake
Subject: Trouble at Poker Night
Date: Thu, 7 Oct 2004 18:08:31 -0400
To: poker-night

Lots of people like trouble.  Little Suzy likes to get in trouble with
Mom by dressing up in Mommy’s leather miniskirt and sparkly halter top
and hanging out by the officer’s club on the nearby Army Base.  Timmy
likes to get into trouble by calling little Suzy a big slut in front of
Grandma.  Grandma like to get in trouble by covering little Suzy’s
perky little body in chocolate frosting while she’s all asleep from too
many “bedtime pills” and letting the dogs lick it all off of her.

None of these things ever happened.  At least not to little Suzy, and
how dare you even think that they did!  By now you should know that the
poker night email is often full of lies and libel, especially against
people such as little Suzy, who in reality are really quite nice and
would offer to make you a batch of cupcakes if only you might give them
a little pat on the head and half a smile.  So shame!  Shame on those
who’ve gotten themselves hot and bothered by this, or any other
fictional episode relayed in one of these “poker night emails”.

Though there is one thing that is marginally true:  you are, dear
friends and sexy enemies, invited to join us here at DangerHouse
tonight for what we have decided to call:

Poker Night!

Tonight!

at DangerHouse!

“first hand at nine”

refreshments will be serviceable.

(DangerHouse currently features three or four kinds of whisky, two
kinds of gin, one kind of vodka, two kinds of rum, a bunch of sweet
girly liquors, maraschino cherries, three or four kinds of olives, and
a giant, man-eating purple goat)

Also!

You are invited to the fabulous ***Invaders From Outer Space Party***,
where we’ll threaten your terrestriality with shocking evidence that
your mother sleeps with cute little space aliens and that your father
is a robot.

The ***Invaders from Outer Space Party*** will surely be your best
opportunity of the fall season to wear the costume that involves the
green face paint.  It will be the one time all year where it’s not only
OK, but encouraged by all the popular kids to not only talk about, but
brandish anal probes!  So long as you’re wearing dilly boppers.  And
very likely there will be all sorts of people there who you like to
socialize with and a good array of intoxicants and probably even
robots.

The party will be big.  It will consume us all.  My cuttlefish arrives
tomorrow.  HA HA HA!

(serious about the cuttlefish)

THE INVADERS FROM OUTER SPACE PARTY
THIS   SATURDAY   AT   THE   DANGERHOUSE

yay!

BRING YOUR WIFE (leave the kids at home)

ANYONE KNOW WHERE TO GET DILLY BOPPERS ON SHORT NOTICE?

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