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Poker Night

Date: Thu, 1 May 2003 03:03:07 -0400
Subject: Poker Night
From: blake
To: poker-night

We had stayed up all night, my friends and I, under the laughing
spiteful moon, full of pent up rage and littered with abandoned
spacecraft, laughing like our spirits, our invisible enemies terrified
by our extraordinary killing potential.  For hours we had plagiarized
early 20th century American authors, arguing up to the last confines of
logic and turning once more to the comforting resolve of violence about
who would emerge victorious in an unarmed battle to the death between
Fitzgerald and Hemingway and reddening many reams of paper with our
childish scribbles drawn in our own blood, endless flowcharts and
axonometric diagrams.

An immense pride was buoying us up, because we felt ourselves up at
that hour, and also alone, awake, and on our knees, like Catholic
Clowns performing at our first brit milah, nervously clutching our
novelty circumscribing knives with sweaty webbed hands.  Alone, but
surrounded by voices telling us to do things to little boys’ genitals,
white sweat filled bubbles of grease paint blossoming forth from our
brows.  No no, it’s ok.  We’re Americans.  Our country was the first to
be marketed with an acronym!

So then we like got into an automobile accident or something, and it
was great!  Twisted metal all over the place!  The air bag left a Mazda
logo branded into my forehead!  While we were waiting for the tow truck
to come and haul the car out of the lake I had this great idea for how
to solve that whole world hunger problem, but then I thought up this
great artistic movement and forgot about the hunger thing.  I am kind
of hungry, though.

By the way, this is a manifesto.

1.  We intend to sing the love of danger, the habit of energy and not
being lameness.

2.  Courage, audacity, and revolt will be essential elements of our

3.  Up to now gambling has lead to increased alcohol consumption,
belligerent rantings, and redundant sexual favours.  We intend to cause
alcohol consumption to lead to increased gambling, belligerent sexual
favours, and redundant rantings.

4.  We affirm that the world’s magnificence has been enriched by a new
beauty:  the beauty of speed.  And not just the blue kind!  Speed of
all colours.  Especially white, powdery speed!  Even yellow speed.
Orange speed, if you can find it!

5.  Something about babies.

6.  Poker Night

7.  The first hand shall always be at nine.  If the first hand is at
nine and no one is there to play it, it will still be at nine.

8.  Nobody cares about your stupid relationship problems.  Well, maybe
a lot of people do, but not when there are quarters at stake.

9.  Bringing beer is lucky.


11.  Tonight!

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